My heart is heavy today...

As a LEO family we know that there is always the unknown.  We can't live in the "what-ifs" because we would not be able to live.  But it is always in the back of our heads(why is he late, why didn't I hear back from that text, was that his siren that just went by....)

Face it we have heard of these almost daily lately.  Officer killed in the line of duty....doing their job, to protect and serve.  

Every time I hear of another officers life lost, I get a little sick to my stomach.  But this time it hit close to home.  Small town Wisconsin, middle of no where.  Not downtown LA, Not in the slums of New York City, but a State Patrolman from Wisconsin.

I could go on and on about how they are expected to protect people(even the idiots who try to kill them) but we are not expected to get upset when one of them is injured or worse.  I could say how my husband and some dear friends have been through a lot, seen too much, been injured...but I won't.

I will simply leave my post with a Prose that my husband shared on facebook a while ago.  If you want a little insight into living in the life of a law enforcement family, read this and let it sink it.  It is word for word fact!

RIP State Trooper Trevor Casper!  Stay safe everyone else.

Because I’m a Law Enforcement Official’s Wife (LEOW)

Because I’m a LEOW I spend 6 months out of the year sleeping alone.

Because I’m a LEOW I schedule holidays and birthdays around a rotating shift

Because I’m a LEOW I think the worst and start planning my husband’s funeral in my head when he doesn’t answer my text or my phone calls. A few minutes feels like hours and I picture him injured laying helpless on the side of the road praying for back up. I catch myself looking out the window waiting to see another LEO car pull up to deliver bad news.

Because I’m a LEOW When I hear about an Officer that died in the line of duty my heat hurts more than ever for the family of the Officer and the Blue Brothers and Sisters.

Because I’m a LEOW I am more alert when walking alone due to the stores I’ve heard from my husband.

Because I’m a LEOW I pay attention to details.

Because I’m a LEOW I treasure every goodbye kiss because I never know if it will be our last.

Because I’m a LEOW I can breathe easy when I know he home asleep in our bed.

Because I’m a LEOW I have prepared myself to raise our children alone in case he doesn’t come home.

Because I’m a LEOW I don’t sweat the small stuff. It seems meaningless compared to the emotional rollercoaster I ride every day that he is working.

Because I’m a LEOW My phone is not set on silence when he works nights.

Because I’m a LEOW I can talk and understand 10 codes.

Because I’m a LEOW I am stronger than the typical house wife. Mentally and emotionally. 

Because I’m a LEOW the horrific stores I see and hear on the News doesn’t surprise me anymore.

Because I’m a LEOW I understand that some days are just too hard to talk about so I don’t pry.

Because I’m a LEOW I know words like low ready, center mass, and bush bond.

Because I’m a LEOW I know everything you need to know about guns.

Because I’m a LEOW I have a hard time relating to other married women when they complain about their husbands bad habits. They don’t seem like a big deal to me when my husband puts his life on the line every day. 

Because I’m a LEOW my life is different than what I imaged. But I wouldn’t change it, I consider it an honor and a privilege. I’ve always got your 6 my love (If you’re a LEOW you know what that means).

By Rhea C.